OK, let me explain…someone in my office just found out she’s pregant and everyone started cooing (including me cause I couldn’t help it, dammit!) and rubbing her tiny belly and I thought, “Hey, that sounds like fun.” I mean, I’d love to have a reason to eat any and everything I wanted, and I really like having my belly rubbed.
And then I remember what happens when you’re done being pregnant. And that shit’s kind of scary.
So, maybe I’ll just get fat.
on 
on 
on 
on 
on
Just get fat. And then, if anybody says anything, just tell them you’re pregnant.
It’s fool proof!