Happy Zombie Jesus Day, guys!
If I have a basic understanding of the Bible (which I don’t), then I’m pretty sure today is important because Jesus rose from the dead and terrorized those who had cast the first stone within glass houses.
It was only after a man dressed in the skin of a rabbit was able to subdue Our Lord and Savior by hurling eggs at him until he agreed to go to heaven that J.C.’s rampage finally ended.
The End.
Similar Posts:
- Hey y’all…
- Belle Is Broken Like Shattered Gladiass
- Red Velvet Cupcake Saturday
- I know I’m being a bitch
- This is why I’m not running the country
on 
on 
on 
on 
on 
Loading ...
THE STORY OF ZOMBIE JESUS EASTER…
It was only a matter of time before someone in zombie fandom equated “living dead” with “resurrection”, and came up with Zombie Jesus.
Just in time for an Easter origin tale, too:
If I have a basic understanding of the Bible (wh…
Hi Lisa,
I came across your post through a google search on zombie Jesus. I had no idea what people were talking about so I decided to check it out. Anyway, here’s a shameless plug for the real Jesus. You said you don’t have a basic understanding of the Bible, and I thought I’d take a shot at explaining it.
1) God created human beings in the beginning to dwell forever with him. Because he is the creator, his creatures (i.e. humans) owe him obedience. Not only that, but because he is God (i.e. the perfect being in the universe) we owe him our worship, or all our affections, devotion, etc.
2) The first human beings, and the rest of humanity, hasn’t obeyed God or worshipped him alone. Because of this disobedience, we’re separated from him. Romans 3:23 – “For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” Romans 6:23 – “The wages of sin is death.”
3) God could have destroyed humanity because of sin, not because he is an angry God or mean etc etc etc but because he is holy. This means he is perfect in every way. He cannot be in the presence of something that is not holy, i.e. something that is sinful. So he would be just to destroy humanity, just as the government is just in punishing those who break the law. But instead of wiping us off the face of the planet, he decided to come down here himself and save us.
4) Jesus Christ is God incarnated into human flesh. He lived a perfect life (one of obedience and worship, one that the first humans and those who followed didn’t live) and died on a cross. His death was God taking humanity’s punishment on himself. In others words, Jesus died in man’s place. The resurrection (NOW we’re getting back to zombie Jesus) is God’s way of showing that Jesus’ death was sufficient payment for sin and is also his demonstration of his power to give life to all those who believe in him.
5) Anyone can be restored to the fellowship with the perfect, holy, just, loving, merciful God of the universe if they repent (turn from) their sins and have faith (trust) in Christ’s death and resurrection as a payment for their sin.
I hope that helps!
Matt Emerson
Oh my.
Haha not the response I was expecting but at least you didn’t delete my comment.
Matt
nah, i’m a good sport.
i only delete comments from haters. and yes, i just used the term “haters.” haha
http://www.explosm.net/comics/858/
HAPPY ZOMBIE JESUS DAY!!
Great holiday.
Yeah. Matt works for the Umbrella Corporation, AND he’s infected.
Worst case of cooties ever.
Salil I already have the cootie shot so I’m covered.
Matt
Noticeably, this article is in fact the freshest on this worthy topic. I believe your conclusions and will thirstily watch for your incoming updates. Saying thanks will not just be sufficient, for your unusual clarity in your writing. I most certainly will immediately snap up your rss to keep privy of any kind of updates. Genuine work and much accomplishment in your business venture!